Dec 11, 2003

A Burger And A Hat Trick


Wilkes-Barre Scranton Penguins vs Hershey Bears
Wachovia Arena - December 10, 2003
Grandpa and I went to the game last night and saw prospect Michel Ouellet scored three times in the Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins victory over the Hershey Bears, 6-4.  After the game, we stopped at Mark II for a late dinner.


The dinner special for the day was the Black Angus Chop Steak, which they also served as a cheeseburger.  Grandpa is pretty notorious for mispronouncing things, so he ordered a "Black Agnes" burger.

Nov 30, 2003

Let's Shake Some Dust


Carnivàle
HBO (2003)
This is the most brilliant television show I've seen since Twin Peaks.  In fact, one of its stars is Michael J. Anderson who was The Man From Another Place in the Twin Peaks series.

"Before the beginning, after the great war between heaven and hell, God created the Earth and gave dominion over it to the crafty ape he called man… and to each generation was born a Creature of Light and a Creature of Darkness… and great armies clashed by night in the ancient war between good and evil. There was magic then. Nobility. And unimaginable cruelty. And so it was until the day that a false sun exploded over Trinity, and man forever traded away wonder for reason."
- Samson

Nov 27, 2003

The Parade Of The Unisphere


Unisphere Float

Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade (1963)
The 1964-65 New York World's Fair was held in Flushing Meadows Park in Queens.  The upcoming event was promoted at the 1963 Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.


This photo of the Unisphere Float isn't quite as clear, but it does show a massive billboard for Johnny Walker Scotch.  Drink up, my friends, and Happy Thanksgiving!

Sep 29, 2003

An Evening At The Vet


Saturday, April 20, 1996
St. Louis Cardinals @ Philadelphia Phillies
Veterans Stadium - Philadelphia, PA

Pitching: Alan Benes vs. Sid Fernandez
Results: Cardinals defeated Phillies, 1-0

I've only ever been to one game at Veterans Stadium, but it was memorable.  My friend, Cyrus, invited me to come with his family to a game when I was 15.  Even better - we had luxury box tickets (his father worked for a company that had them for the season).

The game was a pitchers duel between the Phillies 1996 Opening Day starter Sid Fernandez and Cardinals rookie Alan Benes.  Sid struck out 11 and had a no-hitter going through 7 innings, but he gave up three singles in the top of the 8th inning to Pat Borders, Willie McGee and Brian Jordan.  Jordan's RBI single put the Cardinals up 1-0.  Unfortunately for Hawaii 5-0, Benes shut down the Phillies offense, giving up only two singles in eight innings: a 5th inning single to Mark Whiten and an 8th inning single to Mickey MorandiniDennis Eckersley shut the door in the 9th for his fifth save of the season.

The 1996 Phillies still had quite a few members of the '93 NL Championship team.  Four of them appeared in this game: Morandini, Kevin StockerJim Eisenreich, and Lenny Dykstra in what would be the final season of his career.  The bench that night included Pete Incaviglia, who returned to the team after a year in Japan, and Darren Daulton in his last full season as a member of the Phillies.  Additionally, pitcher Terry Mullholland rejoined the team that winter, but the Phillies traded him to the Mariners at the deadline.  We also still had David West and Curt Schilling in the rotation.

Daulton was a left fielder in '96 to make room for one of our big free agent acquisitions, catcher Benito Santiago.  The other big signing for the start of the '96 season was third baseman Todd Zeile.  Gregg Jefferies was also a member of the '96 Phillies, but he didn't appear in this game.

The Cardinals lineup included the man who broke up the no-hitter, catcher Pat Borders.  He was on the '93 Toronto Blue Jays team that defeated the Phillies in the World Series.  Their lineup also included Ron Gant in left field.  The Cardinals traded Gant to the Phillies before the 1999 season in a multi-player deal that sent closer Ricky Bottalico to St. Louis.

Sep 28, 2003

Goodbye To The Vet


Veterans Stadium
Philadelphia, PA
The Phillies played their last game at Veteran's Stadium earlier today.  Greg Maddux outdueled Kevin Millwood to give the Braves the victory.  The Phillies end the season ten games over .500 and in third place behind the Braves and Marlins.  You can see the construction of the new ballpark where the Phillies will open next season at the bottom right hand corner of the photo above.

Sep 21, 2003

Things To Know In Case Of Draft Or Enlistment



213 Things Skippy Can't Do
SkippysList.com
This website hasn't been updated since September 26th, 2001, so I figured that I'd preserve it here just in case it ever randomly disappears.  It was written by SPC Schwarz (aka: Skippy) about things he was told not to do during his military service.  Skippy makes it clear that all of these things did happen, and he was, in fact, cautioned against doing each thing on this list at one point or another, but he wasn't necessarily the person who committed each of these acts to have prompted such a warning.

All material copywrite Skippy, 1995-2001.
  1. Not allowed to watch Southpark when I'm supposed to be working.
  2. My proper military title is 'Specialist Schwarz' not 'Princess Anastasia'.
  3. Not allowed to threaten anyone with black magic.
  4. Not allowed to challenge anyone's disbelief of black magic by asking for hair.
  5. Not allowed to get silicone breast implants.
  6. Not allowed to play 'Pulp Fiction' with a suction-cup dart pistol and any officer.
  7. Not allowed to add 'In accordance with the prophesy' to the end of answers I give to a question an officer asks me.
  8. Not allowed to add pictures of officers I don't like to War Criminal posters.
  9. Not allowed to title any product 'Get Over it'.
  10. Not allowed to purchase anyone's soul on Government time.
  11. Not allowed to join the communist party.
  12. Not allowed to join any militia.
  13. Not allowed to form any militia.
  14. Not allowed out of my office when the president visited Sarajevo.
  15. Not allowed to train adopted stray dogs to 'Sic Brass!'
  16. Must get a haircut even if it tampers with my 'Sampson like powers'.
  17. God may not contradict any of my orders.
  18. May no longer perform my now (in)famous 'Barbie Girl Dance' while on duty.
  19. May not call any officers immoral, untrustworthy, lying, slime, even if I'm right.
  20. Must not taunt the French any more.
  21. Must attempt to not antagonize SAS.
  22. Must never call an SAS a 'Wanker'.
  23. Must never ask anyone who outranks me if they've been smoking crack.
  24. Must not tell any officer that I am smarter than they are, especially if it's true.
  25. Never confuse a Dutch soldier for a French one.
  26. Never tell a German soldier that 'We kicked your ass in World War 2!'
  27. Don't tell Princess Di jokes in front of the paras (British Airborne).
  28. Don't take the batteries out of the other soldiers alarm clocks (Even if they do hit snooze about forty times).
  29. The Irish MPs are not after 'Me frosted lucky charms'.
  30. Not allowed to wake an Non-Commissioned Officer by repeatedly banging on the head with a bag of trash.
  31. Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions.
  32. Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post.
  33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
  34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.
  35. Not allowed to sing 'High Speed Dirt' by Megadeth during airborne operations. ('See the earth below/Soon to make a crater/Blue sky, black death, I'm off to meet my maker')
  36. Can't have flashbacks to wars I was not in. (The Spanish-American War isn't over).
  37. Our medic is called 'Sgt Larwasa', not 'Dr. Feelgood'.
  38. Our supply Sgt is 'Sgt Watkins' not 'Sugar Daddy'.
  39. Not allowed to ask for the day off due to religious purposes, on the basis that the world is going to end, more than once.
  40. I do not have super-powers.
  41. 'Keep on Trucking' is *not* a psychological warfare message.
  42. Not allowed to attempt to appeal to mankind's baser instincts in recruitment posters.
  43. Camouflage body paint is not a uniform.
  44. I am not the atheist chaplain.
  45. I am not allowed to 'Go to Bragg boulevard and shake daddies little money maker for twenties stuffed into my undies'.
  46. I am not authorized to fire officers.
  47. I am not a citizen of Texas, and those other, forty-nine, lesser states.
  48. I may not use public masturbation as a tool to demonstrate a flaw in a command decision.
  49. Not allowed to trade military equipment for 'magic beans'.
  50. Not allowed to sell magic beans during duty hours.
  51. Not allowed to quote 'Dr Seuss' on military operations.
  52. Not allowed to yell 'Take that Cobra' at the rifle range.
  53. Not allowed to quote 'Full Metal Jacket ' at the rifle range.
  54. 'Napalm sticks to kids' is *not* a motivational phrase.
  55. An order to 'Put Kiwi on my boots' does *not* involve fruit.
  56. An order to 'Make my Boots black and shiny' does not involve electrical tape.
  57. The proper response to a lawful order is not 'Why?'
  58. The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, necrophilia, I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, all Marines are latent homosexuals, Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, or any references to squid.
  59. May not make posters depicting the leadership failings of my chain of command.
  60. ‘The Giant Space Ants' are not at the top of my chain of command.
  61. If one soldier has a 2nd Lt bar on his uniform, and I have an E-4 on mine It means he outranks me. It does not mean ‘I have been promoted three more times than you'.
  62. It is better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission, no longer applies to Specialist Schwarz.
  63. Command decisions do *not* need to be ratified by a 2/3 majority.
  64. Inflatable novelties do *not* entitle me to BAQ or Separation pay.
  65. There are no evil clowns living under my bed.
  66. There is no ‘Anti-Mime' campaign in Bosnia.
  67. I am not the Psychological Warfare Mascot.
  68. I may not line my helmet with tin foil to ‘Block out the space mind control lasers'.
  69. May not pretend to be a facist stormtrooper, while on duty.
  70. I am not authorized to prescribe any form of medication.
  71. I must not flaunt my deviances in front of my chain of command.
  72. May not wear gimp mask while on duty.
  73. No military functions are to be performed ‘Skyclad'.
  74. Woad is not camouflage makeup.
  75. May not conduct psychological experiments on my chain of command.
  76. "Teddy Bear, Teddy bear, turn around" is *not* a cadence.
  77. The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them "You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for."
  78. I may not call block my chain of command.
  79. I am neither the king nor queen of cheese.
  80. Not allowed to wear a dress to any army functions.
  81. May not bring a drag queen to the battalion formal dance.
  82. May not form any press gangs.
  83. Must not start any SITREP (Situation Report) with "I recently had an experience I just had to write you about...."
  84. Must not use military vehicles to ‘Squish' things.
  85. Not allowed to make any Psychological Warfare products depicting the infamous Ft. Bragg sniper incident.
  86. May not challenge anyone in my chain of command to the ‘field of honor'.
  87. If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
  88. Must not refer to 1st Sgt as ‘Mom'.
  89. Must not refer to the Commander as ‘Dad'.
  90. Inflatable sheep do *not* need to be displayed during a room inspection.
  91. I am not authorized to initiate Jihad.
  92. When asked to give a few words at a military ceremony ‘Romper Bomper Stomper Boo' is probably not appropriate.
  93. Nerve gas is not funny.
  94. Crucifixes do not ward off officers, and I should not test that.
  95. I am not in need of a more suitable host body.
  96. ‘Redneck Zombies' is not a military training aid.
  97. Gozer does not dwell in my refrigerator.
  98. The proper response to a chemical weapon attack is not ‘Tell my chain of command what I really think about them, and then poke holes in their masks.'
  99. A smiley face is not used to mark a minefield.
  100. Claymore mines are not filled with yummy candy, and it is wrong to tell new soldiers that they are.
  101. I am not allowed to mount a bayonet on a crew-served weapon.
  102. Rodents are not entitled to burial with full military honors, even if they are "casualties of war".
  103. My commander is not old enough to have fought in the civil war, and I should stop implying that he did.
  104. Vodka, green food coloring, and a ‘Cool Mint’ Listerine® bottle is not a good combination.
  105. I am not allowed to bum cigarettes off of anyone under twelve.
  106. I may not trade my rifle for any of the following: Cigarettes, booze, sexual favors, Kalishnikovs, Soviet Armored vehicles, small children, or bootleg CD’s.
  107. Must not mock command decisions in front of the press.
  108. Should not taunt members of the press, even if they are really fat, exceptionally stupid, and working for UPI.
  109. I am not authorized to change national policy in Eastern Europe.
  110. Never, ever, attempt to correct a Green Beret officer about anything.
  111. I am not qualified to operate any US, German, Polish, or Russian Armored vehicles.
  112. When saluting a ‘leg’ officer, an appropriate greeting is not "Airborne leads the wa- oh...sorry sir".
  113. There is absolutely no need to emulate the people from ‘Full Monty’ every time I hear the song "Hot Stuff".
  114. I cannot trade my CO to the Russians.
  115. I should not speculate on the penis size of anyone who outranks me.
  116. Crucifying mice - bad idea.
  117. Must not use government equipment to bootleg pornography.
  118. Burn pits for classified material are not revel fires - therefore it is wrong to dance naked around them.
  119. I cannot arrest children for being rude.
  120. An EO briefing is probably not the best place to unveil my newest off color joke.
  121. I should not use government resources to ‘waterproof’ dirty magazines.
  122. Radioactive material should not be stored in the barracks.
  123. I should not teach other soldiers to say offensive and crude things in Albanian, under the guise of teaching them how to say potentially useful phrases.
  124. Two drink limit does not mean first and last.
  125. Two drink limit does not mean two kinds of drinks.
  126. Two drink limit does not mean the drinks can be as large as I like.
  127. ‘No Drinking Of Alcoholic Beverages’ does not imply that a Jack Daniel’s ® IV is acceptable.
  128. "Shpadoinkle" is not a real word.
  129. The Microsoft ® ‘Dancing Paperclip’ is not authorized to countermand any orders.
  130. ‘I’m drunk’ is a bad answer to any question posed by my commander.
  131. No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113.
  132. The loudspeaker system is not a forum to voice my ideas.
  133. The loudspeaker system is not to be used to replace the radio.
  134. The loudspeaker system is not to be used to broadcast the soundtrack to a porno movie.
  135. An order to put polish on my boots means the whole boot.
  136. Shouting ‘Let’s do the village! Let’s do the whole fucking village!’ while out on a mission is bad.
  137. Should not show up at the front gate wearing part of a Russian uniform, messily drunk.
  138. Even if my commander did it.
  139. Must not teach interpreters how to make "MRE" bombs.
  140. I am not authorized to sell mineral rights.
  141. Not allowed to use a broadsword to disprove ‘The Pen is Mightier than the sword’.
  142. 'Calvin-Ball' is not authorized PT.
  143. I do not need to keep a 'range card' by my window.
  144. 'K-Pot, LBE, and a thin coat of Break-free' is not an authorized uniform.
  145. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.
  146. Nor should I drink three quarts of red food coloring, and scream during the same.
  147. I should not threaten suicide with pop rocks and Coke ®.
  148. Putting red 'Mike and Ike's' ® into a prescription medicine bottle, and then eating them all in a formation is not funny.
  149. Must not create new DOD forms, then insist they be filled out.
  150. On Sports Day PT, a wedgie is not considered a legal tackle.
  151. The proper way to report to my Commander is 'Specialist Schwarz, reporting as ordered, Sir' not 'You can't prove a thing!'
  152. The following items do not exist: Keys to the Drop Zone, A box of grid squares, blinker fluid, winter air for tires, canopy lights, or Chem-Light ® batteries.
  153. I should not assign new privates to 'guard the flight line'.
  154. Shouldn't treat 'piss-bottles' with extra-strength icy hot.
  155. Teaching Albanian children to taunt other soldiers is not nice.
  156. I will no longer perform 'lap-dances' while in uniform.
  157. If I take the uniform off, in the course of the lap-dance, it still counts.
  158. The revolution is not now.
  159. When detained by MP's, I do not have a right to a strip search.
  160. No part of the military uniform is edible.
  161. Bodychecking General officers is not a good idea.
  162. Past lives have absolutely no effect on the chain of command.
  163. Take that hat off.
  164. There is no such thing as a were-virgin.
  165. I do not get 'that time of month'.
  166. No, the pants are not optional.
  167. Not allowed to operate a business out of the barracks.
  168. Especially not a pornographic movie studio.
  169. Not even if they *are* 'especially patriotic films'
  170. Not allowed to 'defect' to OPFOR during training missions.
  171. On training missions, try not to shoot down the General's helicopter.
  172. 'A full magazine and some privacy' is not the way to help a potential suicide.
  173. I am not allowed to create new levels of security clearance.
  174. Furby ® is not allowed into classified areas. (I swear to the gods, I did not make that up, it's actually DOD policy).
  175. We do not 'charge into battle, naked, like the Celts'.
  176. Any device that can crawl across the table on medium, does not need to be brought into the office.
  177. I am not to refer to a formation as 'the boxy rectangle thingie'.
  178. I am not 'A lesbian trapped in a man's body'.
  179. On Army documents, my race is not 'Other'.
  180. Nor is it 'Secretariat, in the third'.
  181. Pokémon® trainer is not an MOS.
  182. There is no FM for 'wall-to-wall counseling'.
  183. My chain of command has neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Fruit Roll-Ups. ®
  184. When operating a military vehicle I may *not* attempt something 'I saw in a cartoon'.
  185. My name is not a killing word.
  186. I am not the Emperor of anything.
  187. Must not taunt officers in the throes of nicotine withdrawal, with cigarettes.
  188. May not challenge officers to 'Meet me on the field of honor, at dawn'.
  189. Do not dare SERE graduates to eat bugs. They will always do it.
  190. Must not make s'mores while on guard duty.
  191. Our Humvees cannot be assembled into a giant battle-robot.
  192. The proper response to a briefing is not 'That's what you think'.
  193. The Masons, and Gray Aliens are not in our chain of command.
  194. Shouldn't take incriminating photos of my chain of command.
  195. Shouldn't use Photoshop ® to create incriminating photos of my chain of command.
  196. I am not allowed to give tattoos.
  197. I am not allowed to sing 'Henry the VIII I am' until verse 68 ever again.
  198. Not allowed to lead a 'Coup' during training missions.
  199. I should not confess to crimes that took place before I was born.
  200. My chain of command is not interested in why I 'just happen' to have a kilt, an inflatable sheep, and a box of rubber bands in the back of my car.
  201. Must not valiantly push officers onto hand grenades to save the squad.
  202. Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the "Safety Dance" and the "Safety Briefing" are never to be combined.
  203. 'To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is a bad long term goal to give the re-enlistment NCO.
  204. NEVER nail a stuffed bunny to a cross and put it up in front of the Battalion Headquarters sign as an "Easter Desecration."
  205. Don't write up false gigs on a HMMWV PMCS. ("Broken clutch pedal", "Number three turbine has frequent flame-outs", "flux capacitor emits loud whine when engaged")
  206. Not allowed to get shot.
  207. The Chicken and Rice MRE is *not* a personal lubricant. (Skippy wanted this noted for the record that this is not something he has ever attempted or considered! It was something we heard at dinner on 22 September 2001 and it was just so obscene it had to go here.)
  208. Not allowed to play into the deluded fantasies of the civlians who are "hearing conversations" from the NSA, FBI, CIA and KGB due to the microchip the aliens implanted in their brain.
  209. An airsickness bag is to be used for airsickness *only*. (Also not a Skippy-ism...this was the same dinner.)
  210. Must not make T-shirts up depciting a pig with the writing "Eat Pork or Die" in Arabic to bring as civilian attire when preparing to deploy to a primarily Muslim country.
  211. Don't ask LTC Steele to sign my copy of Blackhawk Down.
  212. Must not go on nine deployments in six years that require a security clearance that I don't have, even if the Army tells me repeatedly that I have one and I have no reason to question them.
  213. Do not convince NCO's that their razorbumps are the result of microscopic parasites.

Sep 20, 2003

How Would You Rule The World


Nation States
Max Barry (2003)
The author of Jennifer Government has created an awesome online text game in which you get to create your own country and govern it through your answers to a series of situation-based questions.  The game sometimes leads you to make tough decisions in which there doesn't seem to be a good choice, but   Based on your choices, the country can turn into a paradise or a dystopian nightmare.

Sep 19, 2003

The Cat's On The Table Near The Silver Spoon


I never thought that my grandmother would ever allow a cat in the house, let alone on her kitchen table, but she has really fallen in love with Gendo.  For some reason, he likes to lay down on money.  If you put a dollar on the table, he'll plop down on top of it.

Sep 17, 2003

My Family in the Living Room


Even at a distance, Grandma is giving me the evil eye.

Sep 16, 2003

Sep 15, 2003

A Tasty Contest


I didn't win the tickets or $20 dollars.  However, I work at a gas station and the delivery guy gives them to us when they go past their best buy date, so I've eaten at least 20 of 'em this season.

Jul 31, 2003

The Green Book



The Green Book
Twiztid (2003)
This album was released on my birthday and it's quickly become my favorite Twiztid album.  I prefer the version of The World Is Hell from the sampler, but this version with Esham is also pretty awesome.  My favorite song is Afraid Of Me.  Jamie Madrox's lines are especially meaningful to me.

Jul 23, 2003

Camping At The Gathering



Gathering Of The Juggalos
Nelson Ledges Quarry Park - Garrettsville, OH
Ameridan just sent me his photos from the 2003 Gathering Of The Juggalos.  This one was taken at his campsite, which became the unofficial gathering point for everyone on the message board.  I'm the big nerd in the sunglasses on the left.

Most of these are from Dan, but a few of them were uploaded to the board.  When I get the film developed, I'll share my pics.












Jul 22, 2003

2003 Gathering Of The Juggalos



Gathering Of The Juggalos
Nelson Ledges Quarry Park - Garrettsville, OH
We made it home from the fourth annual Gathering Of The Juggalos.  It's been a hell of a week of food, friends, pro wrestling and music, and I'm absolutely exhausted.  I'll write more and share some pics and video soon, but for right now, here is the ticket medallion.  You have to love the fact that they spelled the name of the city wrong (it's Garrettsville, with two t's).

I'm hoping to get a list of wrestling matches and a setlist for all of the concerts, but until then, here is a list of the artists who performed.  V-Sinizter (the winner of the 2002 Gathering Of The Juggalos MC contest) performed on Thursday night.  Jumpsteady, Dope, Esham The Unholy and Dark Lotus performed on Friday night.  Zug Izland, Vanilla Ice, Blaze Ya Dead Homie and Twiztid performed on Saturday night.  Finally, Kottonmouth Kings, Killah Priest, Bushwick Bill, Anybody Killa and the Insane Clown Posse performed on Sunday night.

Jul 21, 2003

Anger Is More Useful Than Despair



Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines
Destinta Theatres - Clarion, PA
We stopped at the Clarion Mall on the way to The Gathering Of The Juggalos to break up the drive a bit and get something to eat.  There was a movie theater in the mall, so we all went to see Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines.  It's nowhere near as good as The Terminator or Terminator 2: Judgment Day, but those are pretty high bars to clear, especially without the involvement of James Cameron.  It's a good movie in its own right, but I'd hesitate to call it a "must see" for fans of the first two films.

Jul 15, 2003

Macho Row



The 1993 Phillies National League All-Stars
Terry Mulholland, Darren Daulton, John Kruk and Dave Hollins
It's hard to believe that this was only ten years ago.  Feels like a lifetime.

Jul 7, 2003

The Colors Of The City


Times Square
New York City, NY
I bought this off of a guy on the streets in Times Square, mostly because it has a Matrix Reloaded billboard.

May 27, 2003

My Money Is On Bastion Booger



You can vote for who you think is under the mask by going to the WWE Smackdown website.

May 10, 2003

WWE Unleashed


WWE Unleashed (Raw house show)
First Union Arena - Wilkes-Barre PA
This is the first WWF/E show that I've been to since my 11th birthday when I saw WWF Champion Hulk Hogan defeat the evil Iraq sympathizer, Sgt. Slaughter in a "Desert Storm Match" in the main event. 

So much has changed in professional wrestling in the 12 year span between the first and second WWF/E shows that I've been in attendance for.  Although we didn't know it back in 1991, we were in the final years of Hulkamania running wild in the WWFHulk Hogan would go on to lead the nWo in World Championship Wrestling, which is almost solely responsible for the ratings battle between WCW and the WWF from 1995 to 2001.  Today, Hogan is once again working for Vince McMahon.  These days, he's wearing a mask and calling himself Mr. America as he feuds with his old nemesis from my childhood, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper.

The main event at last night's show was a championship match between Triple H and Kevin Nash.  Back in '91, Nash was working a Wizard Of Oz gimmick in WCW, and Triple H was just beginning to train to become a professional wrestler.  The two would meet in the WWF in the mid 90's where their friendship with Shawn Michaels, Scott Hall and Sean Waltman would become immortalized as The Kliq.

Here is the full card from last night in Wilkes-Barre:


This card featured a little bit of everything.  The show included ECW alumni Tommy Dreamer, Lance Storm, Stevie Richards, Jazz, Rodney Mack and The Dudley Boys.  There were champions of the golden era of WCW, including Booker T, Kevin Nash, Scott Steiner and Shane Helms (The Hurricane), and the WCW World Heavyweight Championship belt, which is now just being called the "World Heavyweight Championship".  The WWF Attitude Era was represented by Triple H, Kane, Val Venis (Chief Morley), Trish Stratus, Christian and Test.  There were also younger stars, including Tough Enough graduates Maven and Christopher Nowinski, former WXW stars Matt E. Smalls (Rosey) and Eddie Fatu (Jamal), and WWF developed talent La Résistance.

Results

Tag Team MatchThe Hurricane and Maven defeated Lance Storm and Sean Morley

Singles MatchChristopher Nowinski defeated Tommy Dreamer

WWE Women's
Championship
Triple Threat Match
Jazz defeated Trish Stratus and Victoria

Singles MatchKane defeated Christian

Six Man Tag Team
Tables Match
The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray Dudley, D-Von Dudley and Spike Dudley) defeated Three Minute Warning (Rosey and Jamal) and Rico Costantino
Tag Team MatchLa Résistance (René Duprée and Sylvain Grenier) defeated Scott Steiner and Test

Singles MatchBooker T defeated Rodney Mack

World Heavyweight Championship MatchTriple H defeated Kevin Nash

Apr 20, 2003

Cat's Cradled


Most cats don't like to be held or cradled like this, but Gendo is no ordinary cat. He fell asleep in this position once when I was on the recliner in the living room.

Apr 1, 2003

More Crystal Pepsi Coupons


Crystal Pepsi newspaper ad
April 1, 1993
This Crystal Pepsi coupon came out in the Spring of 1993 when the see-through cola was still the hottest thing in the grocery store.

Feb 28, 2003

Introducing Gendo



This is the newest member of the Schweitzer family.  His name is Gendo, and he has come to us courtesy of the Hazleton Animal Shelter.

Feb 27, 2003

Hockey Night


Binghamton Senators @ Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins
First Union Arena - February 26, 2003
My company has season tickets to the Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins, so I get tickets to the game once in a while from my boss.  I'm more into baseball than hockey, but it's a fun night out.  The Penguins blew the Senators away, 6-3.

Feb 21, 2003

Stay Away From Ephedrine



Steve Bechler
1979 - 2003
A Baltimore Orioles pitching prospect passed away on Monday due to heat stroke.  The 23 year old had a body temperature of 108 degrees when he was taken away from the field by an ambulance.
Standard Speaker - Hazleton, PA  (February 19, 2003)

Since the death of Mr. Bechler was reported, the talk of the baseball world has centered around a dietary supplement that he was taking.  It's called ephedrine, and it's sold over-the-counter and used for a number of purposes, including energy and weight loss.

Naturally, the media has been asking every ballplayer if they are familiar with the supplement.  Phillies catcher Mike Lieberthal and center fielder Marlon Byrd reported that they have both tried ephedrine, but neither player is still taking it at this time.

Standard Speaker - Hazleton, PA  (February 21, 2003)

Lieberthal and Byrd aren't the only two people wearing a Phillies cap that have taken ephedrine before.  I used to work overnight at a truck stop on Route 924 where we sold it in packets for 99 cents.  It was marketed under the name "Pure Ephedrene alkaloid extract".  I tried it for the first time because I was sleepy at work and wanted something more than coffee to help keep me awake for the rest of my shift, and it definitely did the trick.  The best way that I can describe the physical feeling that I got from these is that it made my heart beat faster ,and it made every breath feel like the one that I'd take after coming up for air after swimming underwater for a little while.  It also put me in an incredibly good mood, which is why I kept taking it for a few months.

There was never a time that I didn't follow the directions on the package so I wouldn't say that I was abusing it, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a habit.  I wasn't taking them because I needed to stay awake, but because I liked the way it made me feel... that is until one time when it made my heart beat especially hard and fast.  If you ever saw those old Bugs Bunny cartoons where he's in love and it shows the outline of a heart beating through his skin... it sort of felt like that.  That was the last time I ever took ephedrine, and after hearing what has been reported this week, I'm very glad that it was.  We had it on a little spinning rack near the lottery tickets where anybody could buy it, so I assumed it was a harmless caffeine substitute.  Now there are calls to have it banned from Major League Baseball and outlawed entirely, and I think it'd be a pretty good idea if they did both.

Feb 20, 2003

The Official Snack Food Of Pennsylvania


The best part of working for Sunoco is the free coffee and Tastykake Pies.  I can't get enough of 'em.

Jan 26, 2003

Football and Crystal Pepsi


Crystal Pepsi newspaper ad
January 26, 1993
This ad was put out five days before Super Bowl XXVII so that fans could save money chugging Crystal Pepsi during the big game between the Dallas Cowboys and Buffalo Bills.

Jan 8, 2003

The John & Larry Show



It was reported on MLB.com that John Kruk will be returning to Philadelphia to reunite with former teammate Larry Andersen on the Phillies broadcast team.  This season is shaping up to be a lot of fun!  (source: Ken Mandel)