Mar 31, 2024

Marcie, You've Made Egg Soup

It's The Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown
CBS (1974)
My favorite springtime television special is celebrating its 50th holiday season this weekend.  It's The Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown premiered on CBS on April 9th, 1974, which was five days before Easter that year.  It aired for free on broadcast television every year from 1974 until 2021 when the tradition came to an end.  This is because Apple obtained rights to the Peanuts cartoon library for its Apple TV+ streaming service.  This is the perfect example of why it's best to own a physical copy of your favorite shows, movies, and music.

Happy Easter, everybody, and if you plan on dying some eggs today, I wouldn't recommend taking any tips from Marcie.

Mar 30, 2024

Not A Great Start

The Phillies seem to be picking up where they left off in 2023 with dominant starting pitching, a bullpen that can't throw strikes and gives up the lead, an offense who can't seem to put together a rally and only scores on the longball, and Kyle Schwarber and Nick Castellanos seemingly holding a world's ugliest swing contest.

On the plus side, Alec Bohm's defense continues to improve, and Zack Wheeler is solidifying his reputation as arguably the greatest pitcher that the Phillies have ever brought into the organization as a free agent.  Still, with the improvements made by the Braves, DodgersDiamondbacks, and Giants over the winter, a third consecutive trip to the post-season is far from a sure thing for the Fightins.

Mar 29, 2024

Joe Bob's Spreading It Out

The Last Drive In
Shudder (2024)
Joe Bob Briggs reached out to fans on Instagram earlier this week to clarify how the sixth season of The Last Drive-In is going to play out.

Here's how it's going to work: episodes of The Last Drive In going forward will not automatically be double features.  There will be a few specials that will have two movies, but most episodes are going to be a single feature.  They're also going to broadcast on Shudder every other week instead of every week.  On the plus side, the season is going to continue throughout the year, and we'll end up with six more movies overall compared to the previous seasons.

I'm a fan of the new format.  I have to wake up early for work on Friday, so I usually end up falling asleep part of the way through the second half of a double feature.

Mar 28, 2024

You Can't Eat The Venetian Blinds

Paramount Pictures (1974)
The Regal Cinema chain have been screening classic films on Wednesday night for the past few months.  I was able to catch a 50th anniversary screening of The Godfather: Part II in February.  Last night's screening was one of the movies that it beat at the 1974 Academy Awards for Best Picture, the Roman Polanski neo-noir mystery: Chinatown.

This has been on my watchlist for a long time, but I never saw it until last night... not even a trailer or any scenes from it.  I'm glad that my first time seeing it was in a theater and not on a streaming service where I'd probably be too distracted to give it the attention it deserves.  This is a movie that really pulls you into its world and then punches you in the gut with the ending.

Mar 27, 2024

Sweet Baby Jesus!

Black Bear Pictures (2024)
I've watched a lot of horror movies, but I can't think of too many that had my jaw on the floor like the last five minutes of this film.  This film makes The Exorcist and Rosemary's Baby look like a Mickey Mouse cartoon.

Mar 26, 2024

Intergalactic Spider Invades Brooklyn

The Regal Cinema chain has increased their Mystery Movie Monday screenings from once a month to once a week.  I haven't been to one in a while, but I made sure not to miss it last night after they announced that the March 25th screening would be a horror film.

The movie that we saw is called Sting, and it's like watching Arachnophobia on crack.  The story is set in a small apartment building in New York City.  A small meteor carrying a spider crashes through the window of the apartment that is occupied by the owner of the building.  Her 12 year old daughter discovers the spider and raises it as her pet... but things go horribly wrong.

The meteor crash happens in the first few seconds of the movie, so I'm not spoiling anything here.  I don't want to say anything else about the plot, especially since it's still a few weeks before the film's official release date, but I will say that it's a hell of an entertaining horror flick.  Alyla Browne is especially impressive and delivers a realistic performance of an angsty 12 year old, and practically every scene from Jermaine Fowler is a laugh out loud moment.  If you like horror and suspense flicks and you're not overly squeamish about bugs, don't miss this movie.

Mar 25, 2024

Two Guys From Italy and The Lickity Whip

During our last visit to The Slatington Marketplace, I found this item and it immediately brought back a memory that I hadn't thought about in years.  It's one of those three-sided cardboard stands that are often sitting next to the salt and pepper shaker on the tables at a diner or restaurant.  This one is an advertisement for a whipped fruit drink called Lickity Whip.

There were three different flavors pictured on this tabletop display: Strawberry Colada, Pina Colada, and Orange Cream.  I'm not sure if there were any other flavors or any other products in the Lickity Whip line because I could find no record of this brand name online.  I even checked the United States Patent and Trademark Office website because the logo has the little ™ symbol next to it, but I wasn't able to find any results even when looking through the cancelled or abandoned registered trademarks.  Nevertheless, I am positive that this was a real product because I remember exactly where I had them.

Standard Speaker - Hazleton, PA  (July 12, 1987)

When I was a kid, the Laurel Mall in Hazleton, PA had a pizza parlor called Two Guys From Italy.  This article from the Standard Speaker had the only picture I could find of the restaurant, and it's far from ideal.  It was written about a dispute between the restaurant's owners and mall management.  The restaurant had come to an agreement on an extension to lease their spot in the Laurel Mall, but the mall management had second thoughts and decided to give that spot to a different restaurant called Dino's Pizza.  When Two Guys From Italy refused to close their doors, Laurel Mall management erected a giant wall around the front of the entrance with a sign on it informing shoppers that this would soon be a Dino's Pizza establishment.

I'm hoping to find better pictures of Two Guys From Italy because the place had a very cool vibe.  It had a brick storefront with a glass door to enter the restaurant, and an arched pick-up window where you could grab your pizza from the main concourse of the mall without having to go inside.  I believe that the inside of the restaurant had a bar, but I can't be sure about that.  I am sure that they had a large dining room with tables and booths, and that this Lickity Whip standee was sitting on each of them.

My grandfather and I stopped here to grab a slice of pizza from time to time when I was a kid.  Coconut was one of my favorite flavors, and I asked him if I could have a Pina Colada when I first noticed the picture on the table during one of our visits.  I remember that he checked with the waitress to make sure that they had a non-alcoholic version.  She confirmed that it was just a fruit drink and that it didn't come with alcohol, and it became my beverage of choice every time we stopped at Two Guys From Italy ever since.  It been well over thirty years since I last had one, but I think that it reminded me at the time of an Orange Julius, only made with pineapple and coconut instead of oranges.  They did have an Orange Cream flavor that I'm guessing was the Lickity Split version of an Orange Julius, and they had a Strawberry Colada too, but I never had either of those.

Mar 24, 2024

Screws Fall Out All The Time, The World's An Imperfect Place

The Breakfast Club
Universal Pictures (1985)
Forty years ago, a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess and a criminal sacrificed a whole Saturday to Mr. Vernon for detention.

Mar 23, 2024

Eggs From The Perch

300 Mach Chunk Street - Lehighton, PA
This restaurant is on the road that I take to get to the Turnpike when I'm heading down to Philadelphia or Allentown.  I've probably driven past it a hundred times over the years and always wanted to stop in for a bite to eat, but it was never a good time.  Sometimes the place was closed, other times I had tickets to a concert or a ballgame and didn't have enough time to stop for a meal, and there were times when I just wasn't really hungry.  It was always something... and just about every time, I'd think to myself "man, I really have to stop there someday".  This past Sunday became someday.

This place has gone under a few different names over the years.  It was called The Bagel Bunch before its current name.  I'm not sure if the business changed hands or just went through a rebranding phase with the same owners, but they still have the equipment to make fresh baked bagels every day.  They've got a hell of a selection and it all looked and smelled great.  We went home with a half dozen, including Chocolate Chip, French Toast, Egg, and Blueberry.

There were at least ten things on the menu that I wanted to try.  I ended up having Hunters Hash, which is home fries topped with scrambled eggs, pastrami, bacon, andouille sausage, mushrooms, onions, peppers, and buffalo pepperjack cheese.  It was delicious, and so was the blueberry coffee that I had with it.  We're definitely going to have to make this place one of our regular spots!

Mar 22, 2024

The Photon Responds "No Thanks, I'm Traveling Light"

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire
Columbia Pictures (2024)
I don't give a damn what anyone else has to say about this movie.  The folks behind Afterlife and Frozen Empire have the formula for a good nostalgia sequel figured out.  Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire is a hell of a lot of fun.  While nothing will ever top the first movie as a stand-alone flick, I think that the combination of Afterlife and Frozen Empire tells a better story and are a better duo of movies compared to Ghostbusters and Ghostbusters II.

Mar 21, 2024

Don't Do Steroids or Whip Out Your Junk In A Theater

Love Lies Bleeding
A24 (2024)
When I got my ticket, the woman behind the counter told me that two older ladies walked out after the first 20 minutes of this film.  That's all the advertisement that I need to know that I'm going to be in for a fun flick.

This movie is a love story, crime drama, and revenge tale in equal parts.  There were a couple of the steroid scenes that reminded me a bit of Requiem For A Dream in that it tiptoes into anti-drug PSA territory, but it quickly pulls back each time to put you back into the story.  Kristen Stewart and Katy O'Brian both deliver a phenomenal performance.  Ed Harris is excellent as well.  I'm not sure if this was intentional, but I think his character looked like Fried Barry.

This movie was shot beautifully, which is something of a trademark for A24 films.  The only critique I have is that it could have done without the odd visual effect in the second-to-last scene.  I won't spoil things, but trust me... you'll know it when you see it.  I'm not opposed to symbolism, but there are times when it adds to the film and times when it comes across as ridiculous and does more to hurt the scene than to help it.  In this case, the scene that I'm referring to is unfortunately the latter.  It's not so bad that it ruined the movie, but it definitely took me out of the story and made me roll my eyes at a key moment.

This isn't the kind of movie that I'd recommend to everybody, but there's definitely a subset of folks who are going to fall in love with this flick and I am part of that subset.  If you do go to see it in theaters, try your very best not to get drunk, whip out your penis and fall asleep with it still in your hand.  I hear that it's a good way to get yourself arrested in Detroit.

Mar 20, 2024

I Must Go Punch That Baby

Poor Things
Searchlight Pictures (2023)
This movie is a blend of surrealism, science fiction, steampunk, psychology, sociology, and art, spiked with a heavy dose of Cinemax After Dark.  It also could probably serve as a good litmus test for personal compatibility. If you can appreciate this movie for the brilliant work that it is, there's a good chance that we would get along very well.  If you're the type who would after watching it would find an endless list of things to complain about, it's probably best that we don't waste each other's time with too much conversation.

It's a shame that this didn't win Best Picture.  The only thing that I've seen that comes close to it is The Holdovers and Killers Of The Flower Moon.  I'd still have to say that The Holdovers is my favorite film of 2023, but after finally getting to see Poor Things, I think that it's so far ahead of Oppenheimer that it seems almost silly to compare the two.

Mar 19, 2024

A Pop Truffle Of Chocolate

Head Over Heels
The Go-Go's (1984)
The third studio album from The Go-Go's, Talk Show, was released forty years ago today.  I'm not especially familiar with the record, but it included one of my favorite pop songs from the decade.  Head Over Heels hit #11 on the Billboard Hot 100, and was described by Jane Wiedlin as being "like a little pop truffle of chocolate that's just completely delicious".

Been running so long
I've nearly lost all track of time
In every direction
I couldn't see the warning signs
I must be losin' it
Cause my mind plays tricks on me
It looked so easy
But you know looks sometimes deceive

Been running so fast
Right from the starting line
No more connections
I don't need any more advice
One hand's just reaching out
And one's just hangin' on
It seems my weaknesses
Just keep going strong

Head over heels
Where should I go
Can't stop myself
Outta control
Head over heels
No time to think
Looks like the whole world's out of sync

Been running so hard
When what I need is to unwind
The voice of reason
Is one I left so far behind
I've waited so long
So long to play this part
And just remembered
That I'd forgotten about my heart

Head over heels
Where should I go
Can't stop myself
Outta control
Head over heels
No time to think
Looks like the whole world's out of sync

Mar 18, 2024

Kentucky Deep Dish

Kentucky Fried Chicken (2024)
The latest fast food oddity that I had the opportunity to try was KFC's interpretation of pizza that they've dubbed the Chizza.

Chizza is a piece of boneless crispy fried chicken topped with marinara sauce, mozzarella cheese, and pepperoni slices.  It's very good and tasted kind of like a chicken parmigiana dinner to me.

Mar 17, 2024

A Glass Of Lemonade At The End Of The Rainbow

Tropicana Rainbow Blue Raspberry Lemonade
Applebee's (2024)
In honor of St. Patrick's Day, Applebee's has added a line of Rainbow Lemonade to their menu.  I had the Blue Raspberry one, which I thought tasted a lot like the old discontinued Kool Aid flavor Great Bluedini.

Their Quesadilla Burger was pretty good too.  It's a burger served on a cheddar cheese quesadilla in place of a bun, and it's topped with bacon, pepperjack cheese, pico de gallo, lettuce, and a spicy ranch sauce

Mar 16, 2024

Life Goes Forwards, Not Backwards

Little Fish
IFC Films (2021)
This is simultaneously the most realistic science fiction story that I've seen since Children Of Men, and probably the best love story I've ever seen.  I caught it this morning on Kanopy, but it's also available to stream on Hulu or to rent on YouTube and Amazon Prime.

Little Fish takes place in the United States.  Everything looks and feels the same as the world that we live in, but there is a condition called  Neuro-Inflammatory Affliction (NIA) that is spreading.  There's no explanation for how it's transmitted, and the people in this movie don't seem to have a great understanding on what it is, but it affects the human brain and takes away your memories.  This happens gradually for some people who begin forgetting minor details before the disease progresses to forgetting the people in their lives, but it is fast acting for others, like a pilot who forgot how to fly midway through their flight.

The story is focused on a young married couple named Emma and Jude as they find their way a world that has been struck by this new pandemic.  It is oddly beautiful and scary as hell at the same time, particularly in a post-Covid world.  If this movie isn't already a cult classic, I think it will be soon enough.

Mar 15, 2024

The Third Time Phyllis Saw Me, She Exploded

The Last Drive In
Shudder (2024)
The sixth season of The Last Drive-In kicks off tonight with a double feature of Roger Corman films that were shown during Joe Bob's Drive-In Jamboree in Las Vegas last year.  

The first movie of the night is the 1959 beatnik horror comedy flick, A Bucket Of Blood, and the second is a 1983 fantasy movie called Deathstalker.  This will be my first time seeing both of them.

Mar 14, 2024

A Head Full Of Lies Is The Weight Tied To My Waist

Mad Season (1994)
The only album that was released by Mad Season turns thirty years old today.  The band consisted of Alice In Chains singer Layne Staley, Pearl Jam guitarist Mike McCready, Screaming Trees drummer Barrett Martin, and bassist John Baker Saunders, who would go on to play with The Walkabouts.

The whole album is very good, but the two songs that I remember best are the ones that they played on Z-Rock when I was a teenager: River Of Deceit and I Don't Know Anything.
My pain is self-chosen
At least, so the prophet says
I could either burn
Or cut off my pride and buy some time
A head full of lies is the weight tied to my waist

The river of deceit pulls down
The only direction we flow is down
Down, oh down

My pain is self-chosen
At least I believe it to be
I could either drown
Or pull off my skin and swim to shore
Now I can grow a beautiful shell for all to see

The river of deceit pulls down, yeah
The only direction we flow is down
Down, oh down

The pain is self-chosen
Our pain is self-chosen

Mar 13, 2024

You Can't Go On Thinking Nothing's Wrong

Heartbeat City
The Cars (1984)
One of the greatest albums of the 80's was released forty years ago today.  The fifth studio album from The Cars sold over four million copies and included six songs that were released as singles: Hello Again, Magic, You Might Think, Why Can't I Have You, Heartbeat City, and this song which is one of my favorites of all time.

The Cars (1984)
Who's gonna tell you when it's too late
Who's gonna tell you things aren't so great

You can't go on thinking nothing's wrong
Who's gonna drive you home tonight

Who's gonna pick you up when you fall
Who's gonna hang it up when you call
Who's gonna pay attention to your dreams
Who's gonna plug their ears when you scream

You can't go on thinking nothing's wrong
Who's gonna drive you home tonight

Who's gonna hold you down when you shake
Who's gonna come around when you break

You can't go on thinking nothing's wrong
Who's gonna drive you home tonight

Mar 12, 2024

There's No Words To Describe This Music Video

Love Life
Berlin (1984)
The third studio album from Berlin was released forty years ago today.  It became the band's highest charting album on the Billboard charts and included No More Words, which was their first single to hit the Top 40.  It's a fun pop song that I've been lucky enough to be able to hear Terri Nunn and her band perform live in concert.

No More Words was promoted with a Bonnie & Clyde style music video set in the 1930's.  It doesn't really match the tone of the song, but it's so bizarre and fun that you can't look away.
You're talking, it all sounds fair
You promise your love, how much you care
I'm still listening and still unsure
Your actions are lacking, nothing is clear

No more words
You're telling me you love me while you're looking away
No more words
No more words and no more promises of love

Remember when the words were new
They carried a meaning, a feeling so true
Well, I'm looking for a long romance
Not a picture of passion or one time chance

But don't fool yourself
Your empty passion won't satisfy me, I know
So don't pretend that you want me
You don't want me

We make love, and it's all the same
Your eyes show nothing, no lover's flame
Well, don't promise we can work it out
You can leave right now if you're feeling doubt

No more words
You're telling me you love me and looking away
No more words and no more promises
No more words and no more promises of love

Mar 11, 2024

I'm Lovin' It

McRib Returns...
Travis Chapman (2024)
Art is getting pretty weird, and I'm not going to pretend that I don't dig it.  I kind of want to hang a framed print of this in the dining room of my local McDonald's just to see how long it stays there before anyone notices that it didn't come from the corporate office.

Mar 9, 2024

Potato Chips For Breakfast

IHOP Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N Fruity potato chips
Lay's (2024)
When I first saw a picture of this product online, I assumed that it was fake... something AI generated, or maybe a mock-up that somebody made in Photoshop as a joke.  Well, they're real, and they're available on Wal-Mart shelves right now.

I'll be damned if these things don't taste like pancakes with whipped cream and strawberries.  I didn't really taste any bacon flavoring, and that's probably for the best.  It's not something that I'd want to eat on a regular basis, but they're definitely worth trying.

Mar 8, 2024

With An Ounce Of Pain I Wield A Ton Of Rage

Soundgarden (1994)
Two of the most influential albums of the 90's are turning 30 years old today.  One of them is The Downward Spiral, which I wrote about earlier today, and while I loved it when I was a teenager, my musical tastes have changed as I've gotten older.  I still love and appreciate Nine Inch Nails, but when I'm in the mood for them, I'm much more likely to listen to tracks off of Pretty Hate Machine or Broken.

The other album that celebrates its 30th birthday today is the fourth studio album from my favorite band when I was in high school.  They're still one of my favorite bands to this day, and this album in particular has a permanent spot in my top ten.

I strongly recommend listening to Superunknown from front to back because every song is freaking great and blends together to create what I believe to be the best 71 minutes of music from the grunge era.  Black Hole Sun gets most of the attention from this album, but while I do love that song, I'm not sure it even cracks my top five favorite songs.

Let Me Drown, My Wave, and Fell On Black Days are maybe the best three songs to open a rock record that I've ever heard.  Head Down is an awesome trippy song that sets up Black Hole Sun4th of July is an apocalyptic metal track that could be turned into a movie by itself, and Like Suicide is as dark and beautiful and the name implies.  The song itself has nothing to do with suicide.  A robin flew into the glass of a closed window at Chris Cornell's house.  It broke its neck and was on the ground suffering when Chris discovered it.  He put the bird out of its misery and was then went into the basement to write about the disturbing experience.  That writing turned into the lyrics of Like Suicide.

It's hard to pick a favorite song off of this album.  Limo Wreck and Like Suicide are definitely in the conversation, and depending on my mood, I'd be just as likely to pick either of those if you asked me.  However, the one that hits me the hardest is The Day I Tried To Live.  It's a song about trying to fit in, and it's a lot more complicated and less depressing than it may seem on the surface.  When I heard this song for the first time, I immediately thought that this guy gets it... he captured what it's like to feel like an outsider in almost every situation.  I'm not the angry kid that I was when I first heard this song.  These days, I'm more the middle-aged Jeff Lebowski type if you replace the bowling alley with the drive-in theater, but this song still has the same impact on me today as when I first heard it three decades ago.

I woke the same as any other day
Except a voice was in my head
It said, "Seize the day
Pull the trigger, drop the blade and watch the rolling heads"

The day I tried to live
I stole a thousand beggar's change
And gave it to the rich

The day I tried to win
I dangled from the power lines
And let the martyrs stretch

Singing one more time around might do it
One more time around might make it
One more time around might do it
One more time around might make it
The day I tried to live

Words you say
Never seem to live up to the ones inside your head
The lives we make
Never seem to ever get us anywhere but dead

The day I tried to live
I wallowed in the blood and mud
With all the other pigs, hey

Singing one more time around might do it
One more time around might make it
One more time around might do it
One more time around might make it
The day I tried to live

I tried
I woke the same as any other day
You know I should have stayed in bed

The day I tried to win
I wallowed in the blood and mud
With all the other pigs

And I learned that I was a liar
I learned that I was a liar

Singing one more time around might do it
One more time around might make it
One more time around might do it
One more time around might make it
The day I tried to live

Just like you

Now Doesn't It Make You Feel Better

The Downward Spiral
Nine Inch Nails (1994)
The second studio album from Nine Inch Nails is turning 30 years old today.  It's an album that I played constantly when I was an angry teenager, with Mr. Self Destruct, Piggy, March Of The Pigs, and Hurt among my favorite songs.  It's probably been about 20 years since I last popped it into my CD player and listened to the album from start to finish, but there is one track that has been on more than a few of my playlists in the digital age.
You let me violate you
You let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you
You let me complicate you

(Help me) I broke apart my insides
(Help me) I've got no soul to sell
(Help me) The only thing that works for me
Help me get away from myself

I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

You can have my isolation
You can have the hate that it brings
You can have my absence of faith
You can have my everything

(Help me) You tear down my reason
(Help me) It's your sex I can smell
(Help me) You make me perfect
Help me become somebody else

I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

Through every forest
Above the trees
Within my stomach
Scraped off my knees
I drink the honey
Inside your hive
You are the reason
I stay alive

Mar 7, 2024

Every Culture Has Entities That Tether To The Young

Blumhouse Productions (2024)
This was excellent!  The only horror film that was released after the pandemic that comes close to this is Talk To Me.  I don't want to say too much about it at the risk of spoiling things because it was just released today, but it gives you a genuinely creepy feeling without relying too heavily on gore or jump scares.  The only thing that didn't land for me was the involvement of the birth mother of the two girls.  Her story was so under-developed that they might as well have cut her out of the movie altogether.  Still, that doesn't take away from what was one of the most enjoyable horror flicks that I've gotten to see in a long time.

Mar 6, 2024

Pumpkin Leftovers

It's The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown
Kellogg's (2023)
I picked this up last October and just got around to eating it this month.  It's not bad... kind of tastes like Kix, but with a mild but pleasant vanilla flavor and some marshmallows.  I'm kind of surprised they didn't try to make something pumpkin flavored.

Mar 5, 2024

Cinema 2600

Lodef Mode (2024)
Canadian programmer Lodef Mode has come up with a way to use an Atari 2600 to watch an entire feature length film.  

His creation is the MovieCart, which is available on his Tindle shop for $24.99.  You have to provide your own cartridge shell, but the cost includes a front and side label, as well as a fully assembled PCB board with a Micro SD that contains Night Of The Living Dead, which has been encoded and is read to play through your Atari 2600 console.  You can encode any video file in a format that's designed to play through the MovieCart using free software and a plugin created by Lodef Mode.

This video from the creator's YouTube channel shows the MovieCart in action, using the sci-fi classic Westworld.   The color pallet is very limited and the resolution of the picture is just 80×192, but that's a full color film with audio playing through a game console that was released in 1977.

Mar 4, 2024

May The Cerveza Cristal Be With You

Cerveza Cristal Star Wars Commercials
Canal 13 (2003)
A series of beer commercials from twenty years ago has been making the rounds on Twitter, and it's one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time.  In 2003, the Chilean network El 13 aired the original Star Wars trilogy on television.  The broadcast was sponsored by Cerveza Cristal beer, but rather than have traditional commercial breaks, the advertising agency convinced the network to allow them to insert beer commercials directly into the film to give the appearance that Obi-Wan Kenobi, Luke Skywalker, and Emperor Palpatine cracked open a cold one at various key moments in the story.

This is one of the funniest advertisements I've ever seen.  I'd love to find a recording of the full movie from this airing.  The music seals the deal for me.

Here are four of the original ads:

Twitter user @heyitswindy dubbed the original English dialogue over the clips of the commercials that have surfaced.  Here are the results:

Now, I challenge you to not sing "Cerveza Cristal" in your head next time you watch the original trilogy.